


Little Talks

by emmypuff



Category: Trollhunters (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-18
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2019-06-29 05:52:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15723300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmypuff/pseuds/emmypuff
Summary: If there's one upside to your life being in constant peril, you have a pretty valid excuse not to think about your future. Turns out peace and quiet isn't all it's cracked up to be. And, our poor young trollhunter has to figure this out the hard way.





	Little Talks

I watch from the shade as yellow and red leaves drift through the air. And the sunset's matching color scheme slowly fades to night.

"Stars sure are beautiful tonight." I jump slightly at the voice and turn to see Claire. Thank god I didn't yelp from the sudden fall back to reality.

"Where the heck did you come from?"

She stumbled back slightly."I saw you leave your tent after you said you were taking a nap." She said. "I thought maybe something upset you and you might want to talk about it. But I'm now I'm guessing you wanted some alone time. I'll head back to camp."

Yikes, I didn't even realize I'd said that out loud. Or with such a grouchy undertone "No, no. I'm sorry." I grab her forearm, to keep her from leaving. "I'm just a little on edge right now...and also the rest of the time I exist." I loosen my grip and she chuckles. I'm glad she finds my constant state of anxiety so amusing.

She grins and she takes my now four-fingered hand in her own. She pulls me out into to the clearing I'd been watching and lies down in the tall grass. She pats the ground beside her, ushering for me to join. Well, I guess I just discovered another benefit of stone skin, no more awkward blushing everytime Claire Nunez is the cutest person ever. I take a seat and bring my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around them.

"So... you want the usual encouragement speech or is something else wrong?"

Not this again."Please don't. I just want to relax and watch the stars with my wonderful girlfriend."

"Aww, that's sweet...The usual it is." She clears her throat. "Jim-"

"I'm serious!" I clasped my hand over my mouth. That came out way louder and growlier than I meant for it too. God, I really have no filter anymore, do I?

"Hey! Don't you growl at me, I'm just trying to help." She doesn't seem the least bit fazed by a massive troll practically roaring at her.

"I know." I look away. Not even at a specific thing, just anything that isn't her. Making eye-contact is so hard now. Not that it was ever easy before but this is a whole nother level of uncomfortable. 

She huffs. "You say that but...this isn't you. The Jim I know wouldn't yell at me like that."

I'm not the Jim you know though. I'm not even the Jim I know.

I fall back onto the ground, still not looking at her. "You're right. About the stars. They're beautiful...Also about me yelling. I'm really sorry. I don't know where that came from."

"Your mouth." She snaps, still ticked.

"Ok, that too. But I mean, the anger behind it. I've never been an angry person."

"You punched Steve in the face for calling your mom a nurse instead of the doctor." 

"Come on," I whine, half humorously. "I said I'm sorry. I'm really trying here."

She rolls over to face me." I can't imagine how frustrating that must be." She was obviously struggling to keep a straight face as she makes her point abundantly clear.

"Ok, I get it. I'm exhausting But it's not like I'm this way on purpose. I don't know how to stop."

"You're not-"

"Yes, I am. Everyone just wants me to be happy. But...maybe I just don't want to be. Not yet at least."

Claire rolls over on her stomach to face me and rests her head in her palms."What do you mean? Everyone wants to be happy."

"Not me apparently. I just want to be upset for a little while. I know I'm being ridiculous and this is going to sound weird but, I think I'm grieving myself? A little bit?"

"Well, I kinda figured you were grieving." Is she talking about Draal or Vendal? Or all the other friends I'll never see again? She lays her head on my chest and I momentarily forget how to breathe." But you're alive. How can you be grieving yourself?"

"Not now me. Like future me. Or the future me that could have been. The me that gets to throw my hat up in the air at graduation. The me that gets go to college, maybe culinary school. The me that..." Nope. Nope. Nope. Not out loud.

"That what?"

I sigh. "Gets to have a real life with you."

Her eyes widen and she jumps up. "Uh...I don't. We can still-. We can still have a life together. If -if that's what you want?"

"I don't know if we can. As far as I know, trolls don't even get married. Or if it's possible for us to have kids." My eyes start to burn. Crap. I can't do this. Not in front of her. Not to her. "What if I have a troll lifespan, Claire? What if I to watch you and all my other human friends grow old and die?" The last word gets caught in my throat but I'm sure she knows what I'm trying to say. I completely collapsed into her arms.

"It's ok. It's going to be ok." She gently runs her hand through my hair as I sob into her jacket. Probably snotting it all up. "It's going to be ok," she repeats, this time directed more so towards herself.


End file.
